ever wonder what people think of you, just based on your appearance?  i do.  ever wonder if it’s positive, or weird…or if there’s something comical that they see that you didn’t…like YOU think you look great, but they see what your hair is really talkin’ bout.

i wonder what goes thru their minds when this 5′10″ reddish-brown ‘being’ saunters their way, bandana framing a wild mop of silver-streaked black curls, hovering over curious eyes with an ever-ready goofy grin.  i get lotsa smiles, some come naturally…others, i coax forward with a ‘hey there’ or  a wave.  it almost always works…but after that moment, i wonder if folks walk away shaking their heads.

the reason this is on my mind at all is because some friends and i were in a crowd of hundreds during a music festival over the weekend.  there were so many different types of people…families were there together, friends…lovers.  it’s always so interesting–the dynamics of a person who’s out to have a good time…did they plan to be there, or just happen upon the location and stop by…or were they dragged out unwillingly…would that explain their manner of dress, or their jubilance when they run into somebody they know?   my imagination goes wild in those crowds as i ponder where these folks may know each other from, or what their homes must be like…or why some don’t know how to say ‘excuse me’ as they practically knock you over when making their way past you…or why one thinks he can take your chair to where his friends are and sit in it while you’re in the restroom, spilling the blueberry beer that you left in the cupholder…never apologizing once for ruining your chair as he continues talking to his friends…that prick.

so then, after THAT, everyone’s suspect.  along with wonderings and musings about the relationships i see and what these individuals were doing before this festival…what they’ll do after…i’m wondering, ‘does THIS dude think he can violate my space and belongings while i’m not looking like that other jerk?’  …you know, that sort of thing.

SO…i wonder sometimes if those people that i pass in hallways or on streets or in stores…that look away quickly, are SO slow to smile, or stare right past my head has had some type of  encounter, or heard a story about someone with features or an appearance matching mine.

…and to my defense, a girl gets into ONE lousy barfight and–i’ll just stop there.